Blogskin done by 16thday with image from Taringa .

Honestly, am I not trustworthy? Why isn't anyone willing to tell me anything? Why?! Fuck.

I am not going to pretend that I am okay with it after tolerating it for so long. It is so annoying when people are discussing "confidential" stuff right in front of me with no intention of telling me at all. And people who knows me well should know that I detest being kept in the dark especially when you are openly talking about it and yet refuse to give me any details.


Zz.

Come on, does anyone really think that my absence was a good excuse to keep things from me? You want to tell me, or you don't.

No excuse is needed, much less a lame one.

.

I have known you for these 3 years, and yet you do not dare confide in me or are willing to tell me anything.

Shows that I am that unreliable and cannot be trusted huh.

.

I was never in your circle, I know.
But it hurts to be treated badly while you can be best friends with the rest of the group.

.

I think back and wonder if I was too gullible to be treating everyone as a good friend or even in my mind, think that I actually had best friends by my side.

Because after all these while, nobody treats me as their best friend and claims it is nothing when I ask for details of the story. I am so annoyed and fustrated over such issues in school you know. In my mind, I think they are my best friends and can rely and tell them everything. But they do not feel the same way as I do. That's kind of pathetic right.

A friend, a hang-out friend, a mate, but never a best friend..

Hais, I am such a failure. A naive failure.

I wanna get away from you and you, and even you. ):

It totally makes me depressed from thinking about this shit over and over again.
I really envy Gisela and ZhongTing for maintaining their strong friendship over the years.

Maybe 2 is better than a group.
LOVE,
AMANDA
8:12 PM

It's been a week since I blogged. Haha, missed me?

Updates!!

Fri, 29 Jan.
Camp Day 3 & Steven's birthday!

:D Merely wished him a happy birthday. Anyway, I expected more from the personal grooming talk. Turned out it was yet another boring talk. But it was enriching, no doubt. Haha. I never knew girls needed skills to sit. LOL. After that it was ballroom dancing.

Was afraid nobody would come and ask me. That would be super embarrassing, I bet! But thank god Shan Yi asked me. Though it was kinda awkward at first, it was kinda fun after awhile. Haha, to laugh at the couples next to me (SJ and Kenn; Mel and JH). LOL. So funny and cute. Furthermore, Shan Yi was a joker himself. xD Can be the next Steven. Hahha.

Oh yes, went to Shan's house for marathon. LOL. Wanted to do homework as well. It was an utter failure. After that I travelled all the way down to Bugis to meet my mom. She brought me to a TCM shop, for my lips. Yeah, I think it's much better now. ^^

Sat, 30 Jan.
SHOPPING!
I went out super early (10am) to CWP. LOL, 10 is early to me cause normally I wake up at 11~1 on weekends! :O

Shopped at Metro. Amazingly, I was at the counter an hour later already. Very fast hor. Haha.Bought a pair of shoes too. ^^ Wanted another one too. But my size was sold out. ): Then I went to this electronics store at Loyang (!!!!) and went back to my aunt's house. Haha. Stayed there for ~4 hours. Ate dinner. Went to CCK Bata to see if they had that shoe in my size. Don't have. -.-

SO i went home, disappointed but then again, happy cause I've got my CNY clothes!

Sun, 31 Jan
Woke up late, with a stain. -.- Argh.
Terrible cramps the whole day. Therefore I took a nap after eating the pill.
Haha, woke up only at 5.30!
*Gasp!* 'Cause Elston's birthday BBQ starts at 5.30. LOL. Crazy right! Luckily my mother wanted to go to some place arnd there, so she sent me. (L)

Chatted mainly with YS, KahLeong, JF, Melissa, Mhd, and JooHao when I got there, though Mahadhir and JooHao were just crapping and fooling around. Haha. When it was dark, we played Blind Mice? Ohk, I dont know the name. LOL.
Guess what.
I NEVER GOT CAUGHT!
LOL. Awesome right. Together with KahLeong and Ezzul (Was it you? Hahaha). :D

Near the end, I was kinda spamming Marshmallows and chocolate.
They are awesome mans. And I realise I don't really mind if the Marshmallows are cold as long as it's with the warm chocolate.
Yummy!

At arnd 9.20, YS's father sent me home.
Woot.
Thanks :D

Mon, 1 Feb.
MATH CT! Debacle lahh. The paper looked easy. But when I attempted it, I knew I CMI. ):
Blah, another boring day.
I was sian cause I couldnt buy Dear John.
..

Had CL ME in the afternoon. So small, the words. Make me wanna sleep.
:S And the lights were kinda dim yeah? Had to strain my eyes a little.
I think I'm gg blind le.

Tues, 2 Feb.
Went for band. -.-
Wth. Technically, I didnt.
Just did my homework in the canteen.
Haha. Sian after a while and left arnd 5.

Wed, 3 Feb
I could finally go to JP and buy Dear John! OMG! So excited to go to Harris in the morning. But after I bought the book, I regretted.
GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Harris didn't have 20%. So I just used my card to get 10% off. But when we walked past Popular, DEAR JOHN IS OFF 20% THERE.

WTFOMGBBQZZZ.

So pissed at myself and stupid harris.
LOL. Wanna avoid buying their books now! So irritated omg.
$1.70 is alot to me because this week, especially, I've been paying for so much!
Elston's present, band fund (effffff), Eng Oral, Eng TYS.

Overall, it's over $40! Oh god, spent more than my week's allowance.
And I already used David's ticket money!
Sian. This means I have no more money for th week.
To think Yuni still wants to go shopping tmr!
Gah gah gah.

Thurs, 4 Feb.
Eng Rmd for 2 hours. Omg. She just talked on and on and my butt was aching.

Went to JE popular to buy the PaperPoint narrow lined foolscap, but dont have. Lot1 also didn't have. Haha, but I stayed at Popular for quite a while yeah.
I read the sypnosis of all the popular books. :D And flipped through a few pages of the ones that interested me. But then so far, none of them has really impressed me ley, including My Sister's Keeper. But it sounds really interesting, so I shall buy in future.
:D

Can't wait till my mother gives me money just to buy storybooks. Haha! Eggcited. :D

Fri, 5 Feb.
I was late!
OMGGGGG But my name was not recorded
xD Teehee!
Pity SJ. (:

Ohk, entered the school just as the national anthem and pledge finished. So I was kinda safe, and the OM said, "you guys are lucky ah. (then to the guard,) those who come in after this record their names". Or somethg like that.
LOL. Super duper heng I tell you.
Phew.

Made to stand in a line by OM and VP. Saw other ppl standing in front of the flag with P eyeing/watching them.

OM and VP said we are lucky and be earlier in future very nicely and dismissed us. But P had to make us go back and stand in lines, again! -.-
Zz la she. Lectured us about being late and not being able to get to class on time for morning assembly. WTF! My first time this year eh! She make it sound like we're all perpetual latecomers.
Bitch, I'm changing myself and coming to school earlier already okay. Just because of a couple of rotten apples, you treat us all like rotten apples. Cannot believe you were so agitated over such a slight issue. Wth.

Couldn't stand straight with my bag when P asked us to. Gah, I'm getting old. :S

Band?
LOL, Yuni and I just sat at the canteen, where the Bball team were having their practice. I attempted to do maths the whole time, while Yuni gave up at around 3pm. Haha.

Tried Linear Law, epic fail. I couldnt understand any of the questions/solve them. Shittt.
Then I went on to Statistics. I forgot all I learnt, so I couldn't answer them.
After that I changed to Circular Measure. Had to ask Yuni/Elston for almost every question I came across. -.-
Oh dear god. Why is my maths so weak.

Watched the basketball team once in a while. The juniors are funny. Haha, cause they cannot do the drills well.
:P

Went home after buying foolscap from popular.

Haha, took one hour to write this post, so be grateful
:D
Yeah, tag, darlings.
^^

TTYL, with LOL. (Lots Of Love)
LOVE,
AMANDA
8:58 PM

Hi hotties. :DD

Today was day 2 of camp, and I thought it was awesomely fun. Haha, only the amazing race, which was barely a race. -.- But was definitely amazing. Sunburnt for the first time. Yeah, shocker!! Nose hurts. That's all. LOL. But my rashes are out too. Zz.

Teehee, marina barrage was a serious -.- . We didn't do much there. But it was alright yeah, cause of the company, obviously.

After the day ended, we went to macs with the usual people. Merely ate ice cream and shared fries with Ramya. I think I'm getting fatter by the day. LOL. Every morning I weigh myself, it'd be 100g more than the previous morning. :S

Tmr's personal grooming. Oh god. Think it's gonna be disastrous, especially for the ballroom dancing one. LOL. Crap, I've got no one to dance with and I doubt anyone would want me as their partner. ): ): ):

Why am I so fat and unattractive..

o WELL, Can'T waiT.
LOVE,
AMANDA
7:06 PM

Hi! Blogging bug still not back. ^^

Today was the first day of camp. It was relatively boring. At least there was the company to make up for it. :D Also saw the new level tee (oh, and I just realised where all my money went to this month!!! xD So gonna claim please.)

The new level tee was one word:

UGLY.

Ohk, not the design. I thought the design looked nice with the hot pink (Sec5), and red (Sec2?). Not bad eh? Just the colour. With the disgusting and faded green, it just looks ew.

Because it's like the printings are all black. And I thought black goes with all colours, but that proved me wrong. It's not exactly nice at all. The green is so shitty, the worst shade of green, ever.

Lousy school. Wtf. In their rush to get everything done, they choose shitty colours and did a lucky draw for the levels. And my lvl gets the worst. FMLTTM.

Tmr's the second day of camp, obviously! Gonna have this dumb amazing race which I may be 50-50 high or dead. Hahahaha. Sian.

Then there's the marina barrage. Hmm, what can we do there?

This whole week, I'm back into procrastination, and not handing in my homework. A bad sign yeah. I'm gonna die. But I promise myself, I will do my Physics homework tonight when the clock strikes 10. :D

By then I'd be too tired. -.- Ohk, 9.30. :D

Never mentioned about the concert before. Hahahah! I thought it was ohk la, no comments. One really embarrassing and stupid thing that I did which apparently alot of people noticed. LOL, I thought it was just a small slight dumb movement. But, oh well. It's all over. :D The last song was a bang, where the percussionists as usual, just went crazy. W00ts. It's finally over! But we have to go back for band. LOL. Dumb asses.

Next thing is, I WANT TO READ NICHOLAS SPARKS' BOOKS!
Aaah, blame it on Ms Jane. LOL. She was telling us about Invictus and Dear John yesterday. And then I googled Nicholas Sparks and saw that he has written a couple of books that really appealed to me. Lols. That's cause he writes romance books! Teehee. And I also wanna read POTO which Yuni has and is gonna have. Woolala~ So many books I wanna read. xD Can't wait can't wait. Maybe I shall pull my mother to popular soon. ^^

Ohk, abrupt end. :D
Jiayou, everyone!
I shall try to be high tmr and make things better even if they're shitty.
Because we shall be a thermostat and not a thermometer!
LOVE,
AMANDA
8:34 PM

I don't know what else to say.
My blogging bug has left me for someone else already.

So yeah, overwhelmed with tiredness
Only played Celebrate (for me) during band today.
Ah, not bad, I can play the whole piece with minimal mistakes

^^

Alot of people are excited about gg to the concert because they can wear their new pretty clothes.
LOL la.

Bet some will fall asleep.
-.-

Oh wells, don't expect them to understand band music anyway.

Fun, exciting day, with me only sleeping during Eng.
But that's cause Ms Jane didn't come.
:D Luckily there was CEP for me to do my english summary.
Hahaha.

Nadiah was so cute and funny, indirectly.
:)
And I found my ninja!
Awesomezx.


Something to be disappointed at,
my section all don't know the date of my birthday!
Zz.
Walao, 3 years already lehh.
So disappointing right.

Ohk whatever, think I'm not gonna do any homework today.
Nights.
LOVE,
AMANDA
8:52 PM

I gotta feeling, that tonight's gonna be a tired night.

Yeah, have to chiong finish my eng summary, 2 compos by tmr..

Procrastination is coming back to haunt me. -.- Zz, I don't want you manssss, go home, go home! Also, I'm afraid that my late coming is imminent. These few days I keep ignoring my phone alarm, waking up at only 6.15! :S I know! So late.. D:

The first week I woke up at 5.45. Second week, ~6. Now, 6.15. -.- Can you imagine next week I'll wake up at 6.30 and be late for school already? Sian, and the worst thing is that this year, I can only be late 4 times, excluding the suspensions luh.

D: I've been suspended internally, but that's because the Principal and OM and DM were unreasonable to tell us that we only have 6 chances left to be late in July. And please, I was late 5 times by then already lah. F---. And, they continued from our previous records. Wtf right?! Want to implement this also give us a chance to change lah. Stupid bloody money-eating school.

Yes, I am damn pissed now. No worries, I'll be neutral when chionging homework. But now that I think about last year, I'm so #%@#$&W#$^#$!@#!W%$%&@!!!! Really at a loss of words of what say about what a failure the school system has become.

This year, she implemented the 20-minutes-per-block. WTH RIGHT?! LIKE, WHAT THE HELL CAN YOU DO IN 20 MINUTES? FURTHERMORE, THERE'S NO BREAK?!

Time to settle down, 5-10 minutes, since there's nooooo break, obviously we'll take some time from the next one right?! It's only reasonable mans. And the teachers don't allow us to go how?! Spoil our bladder meh? FYI, I need to go toilet often. Because I keep drinking in class to stay awake..

Ohk, stop digressing.

Then, greet teacher, talk about homework, take out book, 5 minutes.

See- like that take up ~15 minutes already! Left 5 minutes do what sia. Zz. -.-
And obviously the school wouldn't put one lesson for only one block right?! Sians, might as well straight away put 30 minutes liao, or 40 minutes, I dont mind. But 20 is chao ji ridiculous and redundant.

Darn it la, I can't wait to get out of CSS.
I'm so glad my brother did not come to this school.
Otherwise he'd have to PAY FOR HIS NOTES.
AHAHAHHA. pity the juniors, ooolala~

10 months. ^^
That's all I've to tolerate for. :D

Why do we pay the school fees?
We don't have to pay the teachers right? They're all civil servants, my god.
I thought they already took it from our parents' taxes?
No, dont lecture me on my ignorance of how the teachers are being paid.

Whatever it is, we're all paying MISCELLANEOUS fees right! Doesn't that mean that all our papers, and whatever random stuff we use are being paid for??? And that miscellaneous fees doesnt even include the PTN lah. We have to pay an extra 5 bucks. Ohk, my mother's in that so IDC. And and and, I'm sure the yearbook every year isn't actually 10 dollars. We just pay standard so it wouldn't be tough to calculate right! Then still got all these extra money here and there.. -.-

WALAO. Eat my money only.

Zzzzzzzz
I feel so cheated. D:

Later some teacher come and lecture me. -.-
I'll cry


Argh!! So irritated that I'm feeling so hungry
Can't wait for dinner.. :DDDD

See---- moodswings.
HEHEHAHAHOHO
^^
Ttyl.

Labels: I still despise the school.
LOVE,
AMANDA
6:39 PM

Amazingly, I was able to hand in ALL my homework!!!!! (with the exception of Chinese, please)

WAHHHHHHH SIAO BO!
I think Amanda Choo has finally woken up!
Teehee XD
And I know when to sleep and when not to yeah?

Chose the sizes for the new batch shirt, one S and one XS.
LOL, If too fat, wear S otherwise XS and use S for sleeeping.
Haha, Valerie gave me that idea.
Lols.

Awesomezx, but I wanna see the design!!!!!
&&&&&&&&, I heard that MY BATCH COLOUR WOULD BE GREEN?
WTFOMGBBQ!!!

THAT IS JUST EW LA.

I don't need a dengue mobster replica.
):

Ohk, whatever.
The highlights of my this week are these I guess.
xD
Idk! Time's passing so quickly and it's so eventful
Lols.

No wonder Ms Faith said although our being a sec4 student is gonna be most tedious, it's the most fun too.
D:
I don't want sec4 life to end!
The superior feeling we get from being seniors xD
Lol, joking..

And I've gotten closer to a few people too.
So it'd be saddening to leave them.

Ohk, abrupt end
:D
Tmr have Chem test and Ms Choo is regretful to say that she's merely gonna cram tonight
^^

&thisweekisonlythebeginningofallmytroubles.
LOVE,
AMANDA
8:45 PM